[DON'T] QUOTE ME

WARNING: If a quote doesn't make sense, or if it sounds super dirty, or just plain hilarious, then you're probably going to need a background story.  Comment and we'll make sure to make a post about it!


"I think the guillotine would be funner."-Annalee

"Hey we're doing the dishes here...I just threatened your life with spoons." -Sadie

"It will probably take an hour.  I have to construct a tiny bike." -Sadie

"He's HOT!" -Hans

"Ah! You're a goddess in bed!" -Annalee

"I found Jesus on the bottom of my hot chocolate cup once." -Cassidy

"We gotta get the kitchen clean" -Sadie 

"What?! Pictures?! My hair looks horrible!"-Cassidy

"It's almost Halloween in South Dakota, too." -Lizzy

"Yes, I will sleep with you." -Julie

"You can be my wife." -Max Beers

"Julie we're going to have to take down your fla(ahgaka[choking sounds])" -Annalee

"Snog, date, dump: Abraham Lincoln, George Washington, and Teddy Roosevelt?" -Annalee

"Chinese people are the ugliest." -Lizzy

"Why?" -Sadie

"Because there's so many of them." -Cassidy

"Chemical engineers are like brains. Brains without bodies." -Lizzy

"I get friction... Why does it hurt so bad!?" -Annalee

"There's as many South Dakotans as there are Jewish people." -Lizzy

"White, white, and whiter." -Cassidy

"I heal like Wolverine... Except the mortal version." -Lizzy

"You taste like dirt." -Cassidy to Sadie

"We're in a man drought.  Someone needs to come water my plant." -Sadie

"He'd be my sweetheart, but he couldn't be my lover." -Lizzy

"I don't think a kid like that deserves a name." -Cassidy

"Yeah, we'll watch the Office and laugh our brains off...out..." -Sadie

"You girls look like a garden- so colorful and fresh." -Stake Presidency Member

"Look while I scroll to see the rest of his body." -Lizzy

"I love black women." -Max

"I'm so excited to meet Esther in Heaven." -Julie

"What?! That tramp!?" -Cassidy

"I wouldn't be a very good superhero... I don't have a catch phrase." -Jessica

"Who wouldn't like that? The devil.  He wouldn't like that." -Annalee

"I was a black...black baby." -Lizzy

"I know all about where to stash a body." -Sadie

"It's our attitude making it butter." -Annalee

"You know when you look at someone and think 'yeah, I'd snog that.'" -Sadie

"Julie? Who's Julie?" -Annalee

"Is that why you don't wear underwear?" -Cassidy

"Oh! My house was attacked by possums!" -Annalee

"I'm not awkward! Yeaaah...." -Lizzy

"Cafe Monet"

"Everything's Spanish down there." -Cassidy

"You don't know how fast you'll be married because you're foreign.." -Sadie

"You will get my s***" -Max

"You wanna go to the Creamery?"

"Yeah, babe." -Jessica

"We're not girls." -Sadie (at 12:45 a.m.)

"I've shared many dances with walls." -Lizzy

"Max is missing his Hans!" -Annalee

"He looked like he was 25." -Sadie

"40!" -Cassidy

"No, not that old!" -Sadie

"Someone needs to tell him he doesn't look very good." -Cassidy

"If Jelly cuts my eye." -Annalee

"hahaha you little effer." -Anonymous

"Is this Whitney?" -Boys who thought our apartment was their.  We love them.

"We have a missing grandma today.  Look around, and if no one's there, you are that grandma." -DI

"Annalee I heard that I was pregnant.  I saw that I was pregnant? I am pregnant?" -Lizzy

"I'll hook you up with the virgin boy." -Anonymous

"And then I went to bed and was like I hate my hair." -Lizzy

"Babies don't come from gardens! Do you know where babies come from?! The womb!!!" -Annalee

"Power to the normal." -Sadie

"Sadie... gonna have some fun tonight." -Annalee

"Your ears are attached to your head... I'm sorry about your ears..." -Cassidy

"God save the Queen!" -Annalee (to the tune of God Speed the Right) 

"It's coming...*pats belly*... I can feel it!" -Cassidy

"We should just burn those geniuses!" -Annalee

"Why do we like boys so much? Because they give us babies." -Sadie

"If I did this face would you still be my friends?" -Annalee

"I can't read." -Max

"He has electric hips."-Cassidy

"Hello.  Just so you know we're talking about you." -Julie

"We used the bare males in the master bedroom." -Sadie and Annalee

"You're back already? Nobody wanted to rape you?" -Lizzy

"We broke the honor code at our apartment and his." -Sadie

"Sometimes I pretend to be a lesbian with my sister at home." -Lizzy
"...um..."-Sadie and Cassidy

"Wouldn't it be funny if the lightning hit the tree, and it burst into flames?" -Cassidy

"He looks funny." -Cassidy

"...Satan?" -Annalee

"That's black?" -Julie

"Where the h*** am I, Heavenly Father?" -Annalee

"We could be a married couple." -Lizzy

"Oh you guys I don't know what I want my wedding dress to be!"-Lizzy

"Do you know more than two people named Bubba?" -Cassidy

"Freshman have feelings too." -Annalee

"Your mom would be fun." -Annalee

"I love soup." -Lizzy
"I don't really know any Snoop." -Sadie

"I just really like the incestuous mountain." -Annalee

"I'm going to steal your phone and text something dirty tonight." -Sadie

"That's how I like em." -Sadie
"Cause they're artists." -Julie

"I'm never gonna make the quote board!" -Jessica

"If your dog poops in a bush, it means he's really confident... It's like a doggy facebook when they poop!" -Annalee

"So if you have a 1/2 Japanese person, and another 1/2 Japanese person, and they make a baby, would their baby be a whole Japanese?" -Sadie

"I don't really talk to boys..." -Annalee

"That's a really nice festive Christmas outfit." -Unknown

"The mexicans made me believe it." -Annalee

"It's okay I know them! They're my bros!" -Julie

"Sadie dropped the f-bomb?" -Annalee

"Hey, girl." -Cassidy

"Do you want one of my wheat rolls?"-Sadie
"Isn't that the white bread?" -Cassidy

"Your mom's a bad boy." -Annalee

"I overheard some girl talk about how she didn't have a butt..." -Guy on Facebook who quoted Lizzy even though he didn't know her

"My life feels like a constant rerun of America's Funniest Home Videos." -Lizzy

"There was a parking lot, where people would park." -Evan

"I love boys.  All the boys." -Jessica

"You want to hear a funny story? Oh! That reminds me of another funny story!" -Sadie

"If I've crashed when you come back..." -Sadie
"Kill you?" -Lizzy
"Ahh! Sacrifice!" -Annalee

"A peanut?!" -Lizzy